Monday, February 24, 2020

What To Do When You're Sad/Feeling Down || Motivation Monday

hi beautiful people!

Today's #motivationmonday is a tad bit different as it will be solely a post instead of a video. Reason being is because sometimes I, too am not always in the best of moods to film something and try to be motivating. I've been pretty open before in saying that I have my own battles with mental illness and although I stay strong for the majority of the time, there are moments where it gets the best of me and wins. 

This past weekend was not my best and as I usually film my motivation Mondays during that time, I realized I was in no state of mind to even attempt to be motivating. As I've said before "you can't take care of anyone if you don't take care of yourself first." A close friend also once told me that she could tell in my demeanor in one video that I was sad. As a friend she told me that if I needed to, to take the break and not film when I'm in a fragile state. I took her advice and decided that today I wouldn't force myself. Who am I to be giving motivation advice when it's coming from a place of not being motivated, am I right? 

Anyway, today I'm feeling much better in what I like to call my post sad day. It's a day where I wake up feeling like I want to redeem myself. I want to make today better because the day before wasn't my best and it was solely curated around being sad. And I decided to share with you all my own tips on what you can do to and for yourself when you're in a sad state as well. I'm in no way a professional but I've had my experiences in the depression category and so maybe my tips can help someone in need either now, or in the future. So here are my tips on what to do when you're feeling sad or down:




1. acknowledge your feelings and know they are valid.

This one seems pretty self explanatory but not always are we trying to come face to face with what we're feeling. We usually try to run the other way or distract ourselves in the midst of a little meltdown hoping that it'll go away. We look for short term fixes in hope of it diminishing completely. It is important to know that you have to FEEL WHAT YOU NEED TO FEEL and let yourself sink in with these emotions. The more you try to run and hide away, the less likely you are to heal, and the more likely they will eventually come back to haunt you or grow into something bigger because you didn't face them before; your ability to cope with other things also diminish. You trying to avoid your feels and pushing them deeper and further back into your mind is avoidance. And this suppression of your emotions will only lead to physical stress on your body, anxiety, depression, or pent up anger. 

Listen to what your emotions are telling you, write them out, talk them out, and take them for what they are. Accept them, think about them, and then make the decisions moving forward based off what you feel you need to do to feel better or not feel that way anymore. The help of acknowledging and then releasing the emotions after will help you relieve you of the sadness. It's like finally breathing out after taking a deep breath. 



2. make your bed and take a shower.

Again, another simple one right? Sometimes when we're so caught up in a bad day these simple tasks can seem monumental to accomplish. Have some compassion for yourself and give yourself a pat on the back when you've done something that gets you out of your sulking funk. The easier we are on ourselves the easier it is to heal and feel better. Taking a shower can help relax your body. Shoot, feel free to even cry in the shower. (Release those pent up emotions!) Make sure to attend to your body in the shower and take the time to be grateful for all of it. 

Making your bed just helps make your room feel more put together. When your bed is a mess, your room is a mess, and your life is more likely to feel like a mess. Just the simple task of a made bed can help you feel a bit better and more of an accomplished adult. Like wow, my bed is made and now I feel like my room looks a bit better. If you're going to give yourself the time to sulk, do it on a clean bed because it just feels better. Your made bed can help boost your productivity and encourage you to keep the rest of your room clean.



3. light a candle; or two.

This one is an all time favorite because I really do enjoy the good smell of a candle burning. Usually when I clean my room I light my candle after because it's like the cherry on top to a clean room. But lately lighting a candle is my go to to set the tone for me to unwind and relax. It's the illumination of the flame that signals my brain that it's time to relax. Its the peaceful air it provides me after it's lit. The candle may soothe your soul and increase self awareness and can even help put me in a meditative state. Go ahead and light that candle to help set a better mood. 




4. focus on your breathing aka try to meditate.

I'm a first timer at this as I've only done it once last week. But my first attempt (obviously not my best) and my first experience left me feeling in awe. The relaxed state I was in after, and the desire to wanting to declutter or cleanse my life was something I never expected from  just dedicating 5 minutes of my time to focus on nothing but my breathe. It really made all the difference in cleansing my mind and helping me to adjust my thoughts to something else. I felt renewed and like I wanted to conquer/ do better. It was something I definitely wanted to try again because it left me feeling better. Mediation helps with your emotional health, has you feeling less stressed, controls your anxiety, and also enhances self awareness. 

So try this: Sit down in a quiet place and focus on either a spot on the floor or an object in front of you. Set your phone timer to 5 minutes and for those next 5 minutes, solely dedicate yourself to only focusing on your breathing. Put your hand on your stomach or heart if you have to, and just give yourself nice deep breathes. Anytime your mind starts to wander off to "Did I pay my bills?" or "I wonder what I'm going to eat later", pull it back and remind yourself to only think of your breathing. Discipline yourself throughout those 5 minutes to just focus on your breathe and nothing more. I promise you that at the end of those 5 minutes you'll feel better and lighter.




5. go to the gym or workout somehow someway.

This can be hard when you're in sulk mode. I myself didn't make it to the gym on my sad day but I thought about it. When you're feeling down, you don't even want to move; I get it. But even just getting up to stretch will make all the difference. Your workout doesn't have to be a full blown HIIT workout or anything crazy, just even a small brisk walk can help. A walk outside will help you to focus on the blue sky above you, the way the leaves dance with the wind blowing, the grass in front of you, the breathe of fresh air; you get the point. Even if you don't feel like working out anything particular, going to the gym for a couple minutes on the treadmill will help you to focus on YOU. And during this time, that is what you need. To acknowledge yourself and do something good for yourself. 

A workout is still a workout, big or small, and will always ALWAYS have you feeling better after. And I know you don't need me to tell you that exercise is scientifically proven to be a mood booster, decrease depression and anxiety, decrease stress, increase and boost your confidence, helps you with your sleep, and gives you the brain boost that you need. So nonetheless, there is your reminder.




So there you have it. My 5 tips to help you feel better when your sad mood has gotten the best of you. Again, I'm no professional but these are what help me go from sad to "I feel like making today better." I encourage you to try them and also encourage you to be patient with yourself. It's okay to not feel okay, and more importantly, it's okay to not feel better right away. Just know that at some point you'll feel better. The feelings you're feeling right now aren't forever and just as they've come, they will go too. Be compassionate towards yourself and give yourself that leeway. Rome wasn't built in a day and neither will your mood be a quick fix. Take your time and be patient, better days are ahead.

HAPPY MONDAY!




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